Calling the Introverts Out

Are introverts smarter people? More thoughtful? Or just more anxious? After reading this article about the difficulties faced by introverts when traveling (H/T Marginal Revolution), I’ve concluded that, if nothing else, introverts are defensive about their standing in the world:

Introversion and extroversion are inborn traits, and the difference between them is not that one is gregarious and at ease in the world and the other shy and awkward. Rather, extroverts are outwardly motivated and gain energy from interaction with the outside world while introverts are more inwardly directed and drained by interaction with others. Introverts’ thinking tends to be deep and slow, we require copious time alone, we prefer probing conversation to shallow chitchat, and our social lives are geared more towards intimate one-on-one interactions than “more the merrier” free-for-alls.

Confession time: I’m a reformed anxious introvert. I was an extremely shy person growing up, and it wasn’t until about a year or two ago that I was able to shed my social anxiety and join the rest of the world. I may not be at the level of, say, your typical Chi-Chi’s waiter (as parodied in Office Space), but these days I think I’m a middle-of-the-road ambivert. I get energized talking to new people at parties or while out socializing, but I also love my time spent on the couch watching House or Star Trek:TNG and chewing on the show’s philosophy. However, too much going out or staying in leaves me either run-down or extremely bored. I’d bet that most people sit somewhere close to the middle of the introvert-extravert continuum.

Yet, it seems to me that there’s a certain arrogance among the more intelligent introverted/anxious people. Witness it in the above passage. Deep thinkers. Probing conversation vs. shallow chitchat. Intimacy vs. free-for-alls. Ouch. Do I sense some hostility here? Obviously, I can only speak from my own experience, but I’ll admit that I really looked down on outgoing people back in my shy days (perhaps out of envy?). I truly believed that the more outgoing a person was, the less intelligent they had to be by necessity. My rationale went like this: smart people take time to think, and the more talking a person does, the less time they have for thinking. QED. Of course, that couldn’t explain the extremely bright, extraverted folks I’d occasionally come across, but I had a one word answer for them: “douchebags.” Obviously they weren’t as smart as people thought they were, they were just good at selling themselves. (Right, and I’m sure someone like Kevin Rose, a former television personality, techie-wunderkind, and the founder of Digg, is making millions simply because, despite being complete dolt, he knows how to network. /eyeroll). Yeah, I was kind of stuck-up jerk when it came to people who were succeeding where I couldn’t, much in the same way that academics hate capitalism. What’s worse is when two or more reasonably intelligent, awkward introverts get together. When hanging out with my reserved and more “cerebral” friends, our own ego-stroking combined with our hating on extraverts and would tend towards becoming one big bitchfest, whether or not were even aware we were doing it.

Thus, my experience leads me to conclude that the author of that article is incorrect: many introverted people are shy and awkward, and have high levels of anxiety and insecurity. Awkward extraverts are easy to spot – that’s the guy at the party who wanders from conversation to conversation, telling the same bad joke and screwing up the punchline every time.  Awkward introverts stay mum so as to hide their social retardation. Whereas comfortable introverts still may contribute to conversations; awkward introverts don’t offer up much. All of this is to say that introverts aren’t necessarily smarter, more thoughtful, or more considerate of others, although some of them most certainly are. Likewise, there are some brilliant extraverts out there who are absolutely charming at parties – I’ve met them. No single personality type has a monopoly on intelligence or social grace.

So to the awkward intellectual introverts out there, I say: seek therapy, join a club, or just get off your f***ing moral high horse.

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Just for fun, I’ve taken a quick online Myers-Briggs Type Indicator. My result: ENTP

Puzzling, this is the first time I’ve ever tested as an extravert. Usually I test closer to INTP, although I’ve been feeling restless lately now that I’m done with school and haven’t yet found full-time employment – I need something to put my time into. Also, note that Jungian personality types are only a theoretical model (as are most psychological theories), so take the results with a grain of salt.

Tags: extraversion, introversion, MBTI, personality type